I sware, the planets have aligned, things have changed drastically in the last week. Things are GOOD. At the beginning of this week, Nick and I looked at each other on Monday morning and had a mini conversation. He said "It's going to be a good day, it's going to be a good week. I'm going to focus on the positive."
Now, what you need to know is normally I'm the one to say "Have a good day!" or "It's going to be a great day!" (yes, I use exclamation points in my speech as much as I use them in my written word) but lately with the teething, the lack of sleep, the fussiness, the lack of enthusiasm for work I've just lost my optimism. Good friends used to despise and love my optimism all at the same time. I'm pretty sure Nick has, too. So, to lose it was kind of a big thing. And I didn't even see it.
In the last 2 weeks, songs have been playing on the radio that make me well up. They hit close to home. I've come across written things that talk about forgiveness and how to calm the negative in your mind. I'm not the religious type but it said that in order to calm the negativity in your head, you have to learn to forgive and hope (they said pray) for those that feed your negative energy. So, I started. Anytime a negative thought came up, or a negative feeling (pit in your stomach kind of thing) I would take a moment, pause and hope that those that I've hurt would find it in their heart to not hurt anymore. That they would forgive. Not for my sake, but so there would be no negative feelings. (wanna send me to the looney bin yet?). I wish the best for each person, in all they do, no matter what right or wrong they've done.
And, one person did forgive. I'm overjoyed and amazed all at once. I missed the friendship.
I've also been reading sleep training books. And I think we've gotten a break from teething. Jenna's been well rested, happy and sleeping much better this week. She does have to go down at 6 pm for this to be accomplished, but her being so cheery makes it well worth it. I've been happier and the week has been good. Really, really good.
After my last post, I've received an overwhelming response. I've had offers for babysitting (Thanks Em!) and friends that have set up multiple GNO's and the like. In fact, I'm going out tonight! Wahoo! And, Nick's going out for a guys night tomorrow night. I'm excited for him. I'm a firm believer in 'absence makes the heart grow fonder' and with him being gone for a few hours I'm looking forward to his return already.
I'm in a better place. Things are looking good. The clouds have parted, the sun is shining (literally!) and my optimism is back. In fact, I'm drunk with optimism. Anyone else care to join me?