Wednesday, February 4, 2009

The Husband Project

With all the reflection I've been doing lately, coming across this post from the nest and it opened my eyes. I need to honor the man I love and adore frequently. I'll be trying this little mini blog project that the author put on her website. It's all from the book "The Husband Project".

In any case, I hope you'll join me, at least in one of the projects. Nick doesn't know any of this is coming, and since I know he doesn't read the blog, it makes it easy to share with all of you :)

Please comment and let me know what you did and how it worked out for you! I'll post what I did in subsequent posts. :)


Project #1
30 Minutes is All it Takes
Create Some Free Time When He Gets Home
“There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want.”~Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes

Your Project:
Focus on your husbands transitional 30 minutes today. Would he like to be left alone to rest and rejuvenate, or does he want some undivided attention from you? The point is to let your husband know you value what he does out in the world, and that he has a safe loving place to come home and get refreshed at the end of the day.
Getting CreativeThere are plenty of reasons why it might not be easy for you to give your husband some transition time at the end of the day. You need to look at what can work for your relationship. Be creative, like the stories listed below. Brainstorm with your friends until you find a situation that will work for you and your guy.
My friend, Joann, purposely scheduled her daughter’s dance classes twice a week at the same hour that her husband gets home from work. That way, her hubby comes home to an empty house. He gets some quiet, and she gets a more peaceful man.
One husband has his workshop out in the garage. His wife encourages him to go and hang out there for a while before dinner. (Since starting this arrangement, her husband has started helping out with the after-dinner clean up. Nice side benefit.)
Crockpots are The Husband Project’s best friend. Set your crockpot to be finished thirty minutes after your husband gets home from work. Let him know that you don’t need anything until dinner is ready. Don’t know a crockpot from a flower pot? Check out the recipes in The Ultimate Guide to Man Food at http://www.kathilipp.com/
Does your husband already have a great transition routine after getting home? Find some other little thing to bless that time. Maybe it’s making sure the TV is available, his favorite sweats are clean and ready to be changed into, or there’s a cold soda waiting for him in the fridge. It may be so small that he doesn’t even notice. That’s okay – you’ll know what you did.
What if your husband works from home? Maybe the best way to help him relax is to ask what he would like the schedule to be. Does he want dinner before or after he gets some time to recharge? Ask him what would make his night better.


Project #2
Back in the Day
Do Something He Enjoyed Before You Got Married

“Lust is easy. Love is hard. Like is most important.” ~ Carl Reiner
Your Project:
Initiate an activity that your husband used to love. Whether it’s his favorite hobby, sport, or pastime, it’s time for you to get involved – be his buddy today.

Getting Creative
Many a man’s hobby has gone by the wayside due to matrimony. Is it possible that it’s time you learned to golf or fly fish? Don’t try to beat him, just join him.
Possibly the only thing your husband would enjoy more than playing chess with you is teaching you how to play chess. Ask for a lesson so he can teach you something that he is an expert at (or really loves). Just your willingness to learn will be a huge boost to your guy.
Pick up a magazine about your guy’s now dormant hobby. Ask him questions about why he loves it so much. Learn a couple of technical terms so that you are better able to discuss it.
Do a little research. Find out what the definitive website is on your husband’s favorite subject. Maybe there’s an event in town, a lecture to attend, or a game to watch.


Project #3
You da’ Man
Spreading Great Gossip About Your Guy

Your Project:Say something nice about your husband to someone else. Make sure you tell him what you said, and to whom.

Getting CreativeWho are the important people in your husband’s life? Your kids, his parents, his friends? Be intentional about who you chat with when you brag on him – it’s almost as important as actually doing it.Having a hard time coming up with something? I still brag on my guy for things he did years ago. He loves when I tell the story of how brilliantly he proposed (there were waterfalls and stuffed portabella mushrooms involved…).
Here are some other areas to think about when crafting your brag:
His parenting skills
His patience level
The way he treats your mom
His culinary ability
His job
His loyalty to you


Project #4
Heart vs. Stomach
A Treat Just for Him

“You can tell a lot about a fellow’s character by his way of eating jellybeans.”Ronald Reagan
Your Project:Get a food treat for your husband that he’s not required to share with you or any other family member.

Getting CreativeStumped for ideas? Here are some thoughts:
Get his favorite pint of Ben & Jerry’s and hide it behind the frozen chicken. Even if you buy it on Tuesday, you’ll have it ready and waiting for his special night later in the week.
Is there a certain cut of meat that your husband loves? How about having the butcher cut something just for him? Most supermarkets will even do the marinade for you – one less thing to think about.
Is there a certain candy that your husband loves from his childhood? Check out http://www.candywareearhouse.com/. They have all the nostalgic candy you could want (Black Jack Gum, anyone?) while also carrying any modern favorite you could be looking for.
My husband’s family loves something called “noodles and mashed potatoes” (we lovingly refer to it as “The Starch Fest”). I learned how to make this special dish just for him.
My guy loves the smell of baking almost as much as he enjoys eating the treat. Have some brownies in the oven when he gets home from work or working out. (I know, it negates the workout, but isn’t chocolate always worth it?)
Our friend Scott mentioned that he loves cranberry sauce, but eats it only at Thanksgiving. His wife intentionally made the holiday treat for him this past July.
Are you a wife who is an expert at low-cal salads and other forms of chick-food? Check out The Ultimate Guide to Man Food at http://www.kathilipp.com/ for ideas

Project #5
E-flirt.com
Text or E-mail Some Sweet Nothings

“I turn on my computer. I wait patiently as it connects. I go online. My breath catches in my chest until I hear three little words, “You’ve got Mail.” I hear nothing, not a sound on the streets of New York. Just the beat of my own heart… I have mail, from you.”Meg Ryan as Kathleen Kennedy in “You’ve Got Mail”
Your ProjectSend a flirty text or e-mail to your husband.

Getting Creative
Use an e-card service (hallmark.com or americangreetings.com) to send a cute and flirty note.
Don’t know how to text? Ask any teenager in the general vicinity.
Most phones have a camera feature where you can send a photo message. Be sure to keep it G rated so that he doesn’t get in trouble at work.

2 comments:

Alison 'n Brandyn said...

I need to read up on this. Sounds RIGHT up my alley!!!

WineCountryWife said...

I'm so glad I found your blog about this! Thanks for sharing with us how its going, and what you're doing. Its very motivational.