Where did my baby go?

Since I no longer write the monthly letters, I feel like time is slipping away. Maybe that's just the case. I've been told that the second year goes by a lot quicker than the first, and this morning, when I woke up, I was emotional. I was sad. I missed Jenna more than my normal Monday at work (each Monday morning is difficult realizing that I don't get to spend the day with Jenna like I did over the weekend).

I got to work, turned on my sappy mix on my iPhone and looked at the calendar. BAM. December 21, 2009. My baby girl is a year and a half old. How did she get from this...

newborn

6 months

12 months
16 months

to here!? (this photo is ~ 2 months old, I've been slow to upload). I love this age.

I love that if I even suggest the word book she grabs the one closest to her and runs over to my lap so we can read it.

I love that she sings 'Head, Shoulders, Knees & Toes" to herself.

I love that she'll 'read' to her snowman friends (I'll have a hard time putting them away now!) and when she does, she opens the page and says "what's DIS!? What's DIS? What's DIS!?" waiting for the snowmen to reply 'A red truck'.

I love that she's happier waving to the train as it goes by than she is to ride it.

She's now grabbing her shirt, pulling it up to suck her thumb with the shirt in the same hand and her other finger is in her belly button. Or in her ear. Or she's picking at the skin between the fingers of the hand she's sucking. I love that she's a bit odd. Just like her Mama.

I love that she's curious, and stubborn, and heartfelt. That she says "I lub ew"

I called her today, just to say hello. She's with Nanny this week. I spoke with Nanny for a bit then she put Jenna on the phone. Now, instead of just listening, she'll say "Hi, hi, hi!" I asked her to blow a kiss and she replied with kissing the phone. My heart strings have been a little bit tighter after that conversation.

So where did my baby go? Where do we go from here? I know it gets better, but I have a feeling it only goes faster from here. No longer a bean, no longer a baby... now I have a little girl and a swollen heart.

Today, I'm grateful

I didn't do a Thanksgiving post, I've been quite short on time lately. However, yesterday and today, I've had one thing on my mind... I'm so grateful for everything I have.

I'm so in love with my little girl... the smile that she's brought to my heart is indescribable. She makes my day so much better even when she's in the worst of moods. I can still stare at her little curls, her eyelashes, her baby blue eyes for hours. I still can't believe she's *ours* and we don't have to give her back. It still feels like a sleep over, like we're just 'playing house'.

I'm grateful for Nick. He's the best Dad and an even better husband. He helps out more than I do and is still able to take the time to tell me he loves me, or to tell me to sit down when I'm just too stressed out. He made the time so I could read the twilight series in peace, even though he thinks it's silly. He supports me at home, at work and is my rock. We've never been closer than we are as parents and I wouldn't have it any other way.

I'm happy to be an optimist. I'm happy to be me.

I'm grateful for my job. For working in an environment that encourages me and supports my creative desires and future. In turn, I do the same for them.

I'm so thankful for my family and friends. To have such a supportive network is indescribable. I'm so happy to have loving, kind, selfless people in our lives. To love and be loved is one of the best things out there... and I feel like I am loved from so many angles (home, work, life) I only hope that I'm able to love and support as thoroughly as others love and support me.

Too long, it's been too long

It's been way too long since I've posted. I've been enjoying my time with Jenna lately. This is a fun age in that she's running around, talking up a storm, can (and has) said "I lub you" with kisses and is just all around awesome. She's also throwing temper tantrums, but I'll ignore that for this gooey post.

We're in full swing this holiday season. We went to visit Santa and although she says his name and points out every stuffed Santa, Santa cartoon, etc. When we went to go visit him this year, she watched in amazement as the other kids were talking to him, telling him what they wanted for Christmas. When it was her turn, I picked her up and we headed his way.

Once we were standing next to him I asked her "Do you want to see Santa?" She replied with feverish head shaking and "No, no, NO!!" So I asked the next logical question... "Do you want to sit on his lap?" at this point, she's scrambling up my arm like a baby monkey trying to crawl on her Mom's back.

Santa suggested a photo with Mom and baby. I looked over at Nick and said "How about a FAMILY photo" (shooting daggers). Nick came and sat on Santa's right knee, I sat on his left knee (how long has it been since I've sat on Santa's lap!?) and I held Jenna to my left side... as far from the fat jolly man as possible.

We snapped a few photos and I didn't like them... I wanted to mimick last year's photo. So, I asked Santa if we could try again. He said OK and I put the munchkin on his lap. Her eyes were filled with terror and she was signing "All Done" over and over and over... also saying "No" and shaking her head back and forth. BUT Mama got her photo.... :)

Lately we've taken to driving around to look at Christmas lights. It doesn't matter if there is a single strand on the gutters or if there's a full display with reindeer and blow up snow globes... the same reaction comes from the back seat each time we pass by a lit house. "Wow, wow, WOW!!" the second that it's out of her sight this can be heard "More, please... more, PLEASE" I haven't been able to figure out how to tell her that we'll get to the next house ASAP.

She also loves the tree (when the lights are off, we tell her it's sleeping... she makes the shhhh face as to not disturb the tree). The red balled ornaments she would point out and say "Apple" and I kindly remind her that they're not apples, but they're ornaments. To which she replies with 'orddednts' (or something similar... it's hard to type out toddler speak). She also enjoys pointing out each person's stocking.

Possesion is really big to her right now. When we explain that she can't have Mommy's coffee... she points and says "Mommy's" then turns to Nicks and says "Daddy's"... same with pretty much all beverages and anything else she's not supposed to have (we tell her it's ours as to avoid her throwing fits to get it... ours = off limits... it's working, sort of).

Ahhh, she's fun. I love her. Can we keep her like this forever?

The P family annual tree trip!

Last year, the P family was nice enough to bring us down a Christmas tree from their annual trip up to the mountains to cut down a tree. Last year, we traded them for a raspberry teething paci (tree for a paci, fair trade, right!?) This year, we decided to join in the fun.

So we gathered all the cold weather gear we could find (including Jenna's awesome snowsuit sent out from New Jersey courtesy of Nana) and picked up some super cute rain boots for Jenna. We bought the next size up to hopefully last her the season. That proved to be a bit of a mistake. As we hiked through the snow (while I carried her) I would hear 'uh oh, uh oh, uh oh!' I looked down... Jenna was wearing one boot... turn around and 3 feet behind us was the other hello kitty boot on the ground... pick it up, put it on start walking again... repeat. Over and over and over. Meh, at least they're cute!

We found our tree pretty quickly, and returned to replace her boot once again ;)
Here we are with the Christmas tree of 2009. Isn't it purdy!? Yeah, I love it. Too bad it was WAY too tall for our little ceilings. Maybe next year we'll be in a house with vaulted ceilings!? Maybe?

Landon wasn't digging the sled. I think he was playing along, but just wasn't excited about it. He liked being there, but preferred to be held.

Jenna, on the other hand... once she discovered the sled... it was all over. If we picked her up, she was ANGRY! Put me down people! Don't you know there's a sled and snow to play in!?

Can you say 'love'!?

We picked her up yet again for a quick photo op. See the displeasure on her face!? WHY AM I NOT DOWN ON THE GROUND!?

Stomping around in the snow...

The P family dogs came along for some fun, too!

Someone pull this!

Yep, Landon wasn't into it... They really are opposite in their mannerisms.

Sally brought along the best chili ever! Perfect on such a cold day!

More sled action. I know you're shocked.

She figured if she just laid down then she wouldn't have to maneuver in that 'can't put my arms down' snowsuit and she could just enjoy the ride.

LOTS of trees!

Ours is loaded up and ready go 4 wheelin once again! This is the first time the 4Runner's been on fresh snow. We had a blast 4 wheeling :)

The P family with their tree! (They have vaulted ceilings, can you tell!?)

The night before the trip I went to get gas at 9:30 pm. When I got in the car to go, the driver's side headlight was out. With no auto parts stores open at that time of night, I just filled up and we were on our way the next day. We let the caravan know our issue and they kept an eye out for our one eye on the drive up. On the drive back down to the bay, we stopped in Auburn for gas. As we were leaving the gas station, we noticed the other light was out. It was 6pm, in November, pitch black out with NO headlights! We pulled over with the group, looked up the nearest Target and headed that direction with our high beams on blinding only one party of our caravan. On our way, we saw an open Kragen Auto Parts, on a Sunday evening, at 6:30 pm in Auburn. A quick u-turn and stop and we were on the road again.

The trip was beyond fun. It was a suuuper long day, Jenna barely napped at all (30 minutes there, 30 minutes after loading up and 30 minutes before getting home. We left our house at 7am and didn't get home until 9 at night.

I think it's pretty safe to say that we'll be adding this tradition to our agenda next year for sure!

Just a glimpse...

Each day, my heart skips a beat at the mere thought of just a glimpse. I know, hope and dream that the day will go well. In the morning I consider sneaking a peek before work but realize that would be foolish and cruel. I wish the paparazzi would stalk her like they do the celebrities.

When I do get a moment, when I get that first glimpse of her, my heart is pounding, my smile is wide and I look forward to the minute that I get to hug her. Of course, the second she's handed over, she leans way off to the side pointing, yelling either a) banannaaaa!!!! or b) shooooeeeessss!!!!!



Who needs your Mama at the end of the day when there are banana's and shoes to reach for? In the end, it's still worth it for the unsolicited hug or kiss.

She just makes me smile...

It's that time of year! Halloween was yesterday and I didn't think I shot *that* many photos, but in the end.... I did.

There are photos of me when I was about Jenna's age (or maybe younger, I don't really remember) when My parents were carving up the pumpkins and let me play with the innerds... I was not brave enough to let Jenna play with the guts of the pumpkin, but we put her in her high chair while we carved the little pumpkin and I shot some photos. I love the look of concentration on her face. She had a good time!

She loved putting the crayons in the eyes of the pumpkin... over and over and over.

Yucky! she wipes her hands when there's goo on them... I think she had just reached in the pumpkin...
This goes HERE!?
Jenna was Minnie Mouse this year... and a cute one she was! This is at Day Care, I stayed behind to shoot just one image..... I never get to drop her off so I went in late to work to see all the kiddos dressed up... I love this image.
My pretty girl having her ears straightened out by Irma.

Getting used to the ears


We've taught her to 'sniff' the flowers.

bloomers...
practicing trick or treating. When it came time for the real thing... the girl RAN between the houses... she loved, loved, loved going from door to door. Wasn't interested in the candy, but was interested in getting the show on the road. When we came back to the house she was UPSET! She wanted to keep on keepin on...
My beautiful girl likes to sit at the dining room table.
A bad case of diaper rash yielded the 'naked chef'.

Blogger Challenge #5

What is your favorite Halloween candy of all time?

Yes. I love Halloween candy. I love that they're bite sized (think small plates!) so I can have 5 different types instead of a whole candy bar. I'm not a big fan of tootsie rolls... they just aren't my cup of tea, but I love the sour, the cheap chocolate, the fruity, pretty much all Halloween candy.

We'll be taking Jenna trick or treating this year, only to a few houses before putting her to bed (hopefully late to prepare for the time change!) but once she's asleep, I can't wait to dig through her goods! Weeee!!!

Blogger Challenge #4

What was your (or your child's) "best" Halloween costume ever? (Bonus points for photos!)

I pink puffy heart Jenna as a little squirt from last year. The costume was essentially a hoodie and a pair of pants. It was WAY too big for her, but she was just adorable in it, working on her head control during tummy time was awesome to watch. She was also a flower last year and that was a bit hit, too. However, it was warm last October and I had to take her out of the costume after only a short amount of time because she was roasty toasty.

My favorite costume? In the 6th grade, I was a headless person. My Mom came up with the costume idea. I wore a pair of my dads pants, pulled up to my shoulders (I don't remember what I did with my arms all day long!) a shirt hung on a frame of coat hangers and stuffed with newspaper that sat on my shoulders. The arms of the shirt came together just under my chin... sooo I looked like I was walking around carrying my own head. During the parade at lunch, the coat hangers came undone and collapsed on me, but it was a pretty cool idea, none-the-less.

Blogger Challenge #3

What is a specific moment/event that made you realize you were truly "a grown-up"?

I have a couple.
1) Shortly after our first wedding shower, I started packing up all of my college dishes to give away to a college student. I realized that I was putting 'grown up' items away. Years from that day I would tell the story of who gave us what items for our wedding years ago. I would look back fondly of that time and be able to tell my children the same stories my Mom told me.

2) We hired a high school student to do some filing at my work. It didn't take long for me to realize I related more to her Mom than to her :-/

3) When becoming a Mom. With a daily routine for cleaning, work and home.

Jenna's First Haircut

WHY do I need my hair cut!?

She did really, really well. Didn't freak out at all, and in the end it's pretty cute. We were scared it would end up looking mullet-ish, but in the end... not at all!

She does look more like a big girl now, but the wispy ends allow for her to still have some baby hair :)

Jenna is just shy of 16 months old.

My head is spinning

So, over the last 3 weeks or so, I've realized such a change in Jenna. She's really a little person, displaying her wants, her needs, her desires. She's throwing less tantrums because she's really able to express herself now.

I can *talk* to my child now. She can converse back with us. She says so many words every time I try to write them down, I miss A LOT. She sings 'take me out to the ball game' with us. I'm going to try to list a number of the words she's saying but I know this list will not be all the words. I.just.can't.keep.up!

Tree, apple, light, more, please, up, down, Pop, Poppy, Mama, Daddy, Mom, Dad, Daddy, bath, potty, broccoli, cheese, sock, shoes, zapatos, boca, eye, nose, head, cabesa, mesa, Noble, bye, hi, go, Ohhhh Doctor!!! (phrase used when the Yanks hit a home run), kisses... the list goes on and on. She repeats new words daily and frankly, I don't know what to do with such a verbal child! Oh, I left out the word 'crap' which she's repeated but not used in context... much better than some of the other words that came out of our mouths during the 49ers game the other day.
We went to the pumpkin farm a few weekends ago. We had a blast. Jenna loved pushing the pumpkins over then trying to pick them up...

She's so big, so independent, such a toddler. I *love* this age. I love that she's striking out on her own every chance she's got.

Although I can't say I'm surprised. The girl has always been opinionated. Need I remind you that she likes to make a statement?

Seriously... look at this kid. So different than 6 months ago. When they say 'this too, shall pass' they're not kidding. The blink of an eye yields a different child entirely. And yet, she's not all that different. She still makes us aware of her wants, her needs, her desires... rather forcefully. But now I'm able to encourage her to phrase things instead of just balling or screaming. Crazy cool is what it is. Crazy cool.

Jenna is just shy of 16 months and blowing my mind.