Sunday, April 3, 2011

Three Month Letter

Dear Clara Jane,

Today you are 3 months old. Where the time has gone is beyond me. You, my dear, have absolutely filled our lives with so much joy and love, we hardly know what to do with ourselves. Your Daddy, Jenna, Irma and I will all bend over backwards and do whatever needs to be done to see your smile. And those dimples slay us. Often times, we just come out looking silly as you stare at us.

I went back to work this month. Before I did, we went to as many Mommy & Me groups as possible and I ate plenty of cupcakes for both of us. I can't help it, they're delicious and right across the street from Day One.
We had the opportunity to go up to Nanny & Poppie's house for a visit. You did absolutely wonderfully. I think you enjoyed the dry mountain air. Having Nanny there to spoil you helps tremendously as well.
Right before heading back to work, I wanted to get photos of you and Jenna among the beautiful daffodils in Livermore. I had great visions of you and her with smiles surrounded by flowers. You had other ideas:
Once I told Jenna it wasn't appropriate to try to hush you, you actually quieted down a bit.
Until you realized I had you in a basket, you had no pacifier and you weren't physically touching me.... We fixed all those problems:
You're so inquisitive. You don't hesitate to evaluate everything around you, size it up, and then decide whether you're going to smile or cry.... or just continue to stare with those ever active eyebrows.
You've been terrific at Irma's. For the first few weeks, she threatened to keep you. She said you were just the perfect baby, smiling all day long, only whimpering when you were hungry or needed to sleep. She adores you and we couldn't be happier to have you with your sister during the day. I love the faces that you give me. It makes me ache to come home and see what 'face' I'll be getting when I see you.
And then, when you're sleeping, I just want to smooch your sleepy baby lips. It's moments like this that I just want to hold on to. I know it's all fleeting and that makes me sad, however, the thought of you walking and talking and playing with Jenna makes me wish time moved faster. It's a strange dichotomy.
Your chubby baby toes... again, it's all fleeting. Soon you'll have stinky toddler feet. And painted toes. And as much as I try to deny the fact that now I'll have *two* teenage daughters, one day you'll be wearing heels and makeup and driving away.... It's those thoughts that make me grab my camera as much as possible and capture you now. New, fresh and squishy.
Your sister loves you so very much. Sometimes a little too much. She wants to hug and kiss and squeeze you. She tries to help you hold your rattle and gets excited when you look at her and smile at her. She's just as smitten as the rest of us.
You may be small (petite, really), but you've opened our lives to a love I didn't think was possible. You continue to enrich each of our lives with a sense of wonder. Thank you, CJ.



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